


Say Something

by jeffthemermaid



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Mental Health Issues, Oral Sex, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Smut, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 05:54:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14326017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeffthemermaid/pseuds/jeffthemermaid
Summary: Raven and Bellamy. Struggle. Smut. Mental Health Issues. Love.





	1. Chapter 1

Raven was aware that having sex with her wasn’t easy. Painfully aware.

And he was always so gentle, holding her tenderly, understanding her frustration, remaining attentive, always noticing when she was in pain or uncomfortable. She couldn’t go on top or hold any exciting positions, not with her leg so useless. She also had to have a lot of pillows and padding under her to minimise discomfort, her leg had to be held in position, moved out of the way, and even the slightest jolt at the wrong angle and she’d be fighting back tears at the raw pain.

Bellamy was so good about it. She knew he liked it rough and exciting, she’d been with him before she’d lost use of her leg, back when they were first on the ground. But now, he’d changed gears just for her, and slow and gentle was the name of the game.

And if she ever forgot her guilt and shame for a few seconds she really enjoyed it. It was so tender, so good, he was talented and knew where all the most sensuous places were, everything other guys miss, like her sweetest spot, the clitoris, Bellamy was the master of.

But her embarrassment, guilt and shame still gnawed at her almost constantly. They’d been together for months and still he constantly had to reassure her she was safe, and to be fair, in his arms was the only place she felt safe. She also was incapable of getting on her knees to blow him, but she’d figured out a way around that by having him lay on the bed and lying between his legs, or beside him and rewarding him lavishly for his attentions.

She always felt vulnerable in bed, without her brace, as she was incapable of being independent. But they had worked it out, and despite her doubts and worries, she knew at the end of the day, they loved each other and she was happy.

And tonight, had been a good night. She and Bellamy had gone out, eaten dinner together with their friends, then gone for a drive, just the two of them. They’d gotten frisky on the way home, kissing, and giggling like teenagers and having a damn good time.

Now they were back in their bedroom, Bellamy was stacking pillows and Raven was unbuckling her brace. Bellamy wrapped his strong arms around her as she detached it, most of her weight (not a lot really) going onto him as she become reliant on only her good leg, and leaned the brace against the wall.

“There’s no fun reveal when your fucking a cripple am I right?” She attempted to joke as Bellamy held her while she unzipped her jeans.

“You’re not a cripple.” Bellamy corrected her as he helped her slide her jeans and underwear down to the ground and then lifted her out of them. He laid her on the bed, shuffling around until she was comfortable. Only then did he allow himself to enjoy the view of her exposed womanhood.

“Mmhhmm, hello gorgeous.” He murmured, crawling on the bed above her, planting a kiss so wet and hot on the little nub he knew so well she began getting wet almost immediately.

She continued to be turned on as he kissed his way up her abdomen, removing her shirt and applying his mouth deliciously to her breasts. Her nipples were hard and she was breathing heavily by the time he reached her mouth. She kissed him hungrily, holding his head with her hands, feelings his soft hair and rubbing his strong shoulders rhythmically.

Bellamy made quick work of removing his shirt and pants, exposing his fantastic arms, chiselled abdominal muscles, gorgeous hips, and his impressive manhood, which was throbbing with his desire.

They caressed each other’s bodies and kissed passionately, Raven delighting in his taste, his fresh clean smell and in his hot wet mouth.

She reached down, pleasuring his cock with her hand, making him moan and gasp her name as she ran her thumb over his sensitive tip and pumped his shaft.

Unable to wait any longer Bellamy gently lifted Raven thighs, lifting her dead leg up above her hip as she bent her good leg of her own accord, opening the way for him to ravish her entry.

He leant down to kiss her sensitive spot again, and licked her opening, making her shudder. His payed around with her nub, rolling her between his fingers and stroking and fondling her vagina until she was ravished in pleasure and felt certain she was ready to take all of him girth and length inside her.

He entered with precision tactic, gentle and slow, her tightness resisting him, her gasping and squeezing her eyes shut, whimpering as she adjusted to his size. He was so big and no matter how many times they had sex she never got used to it.

She sighed in satisfaction as he filled her up and then started moving inside her.

“You all right babe?” He moaned his question in her ear as he lay above her, support by his elbows on either side of her, their bodies pressed together, his head beside hers, pressed into a pillow as his hips worked hard, thrusting in and out with perfect rhythm.

She groaned an affirmative, pushing her hips up to meet him to the best of her ability, which was half really, and clung to him, her hands in his curly hair and grasping at his shoulders. She liked him close, liked feeling her breasts crushed against his strong chest, liked having all his length pumping into her, liked to hear his ragged breathing and moans, his hot breath against her neck as he exerted himself for their pleasure.

Bellamy lifted a little, using one hand to hold her chin, her rose bud mouth open as he devoured it, her long lashes tickling him as he kissed her hard, loving the feel of her plump lips forcefully kissing him in return.

Excited and in a world of pleasure Bellamy sped up, thrusting into her tight walls with vigour until Raven suddenly cried out, her face scrunching up with pain.

“Oh Raven, Raven, I’m sorry.” He face and voice expressing regret at hurting her, his body stopping mid stroke as he immediately pulled out, with what really is impressive self-control.

“No, it’s okay, it’s just my spine, can you, I think just move my hips to the left a little.” She panted, her body shuddering in pain. “Of course.” Bellamy immediately did as she said, cringing as she bit back a scream as a shooting pain went through her back. “Raven!”

He stood up, all thoughts of sex flying from his mind as Raven started convulsing on the bed, tears pouring as she screamed in agony.

Bellamy pulled on his pants and searched desperately for his phone. He found and it and hit speed dial. He knelt beside the bed, holding Raven’s hand as she wailed in pain until the phone finally picked up.

“Hello? Abbey? I need you right now, Raven’s having some kind of fit.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

“Hey gorgeous.” Raven murmured as she awoke next to the warmth of Bellamy’s body.

“Hey baby. How you feel?” Bellamy asked from his position lying beside her. They were snuggled up in a narrow hospital cot so he was on his side, one arm under her pillow, the other rested on her stomach, his body pressed entirely against hers to avoid falling off.

Raven shrugged, she wasn’t in pain anymore thanks to the morphine steadily pumping into her system from the drip in her arm and her seizures had stopped. The doctors had explained what happened but she had barley listened. She couldn’t handle any more bad news.

“I’m okay, better with you here.” She informed him truthfully. She found the hospital weirdly cold and his warmth was welcome. His presence also made her feel like she was wrapped in a blanket of safety, tethering her to reality, keeping her from getting lost in the darkness.

Bellamy looked like he wanted to pursue talking about her health, but a harsh look from her silenced him on the subject. “When do I get to go home?” She asked, linking her hand with his, playing with his fingers on her stomach distractedly. Bellamy watched, he liked the way she fiddled with things, especially when she fiddled with his hair, or hands, or face, or anywhere really. She was one of those people, she liked to be held, she like to touch things, she was inquisitive, like a baby, picking everything up to inspect it.

“The doctor is coming to release you as soon as he’s free. Should be soon. You have to rest at home though, no mechanics, or welding, or wiring, or hacking, nothing but rest and relaxation for you.” He informed her with a poke in the ribs and a mischievous grin.

“But I’ll die of boredom.” She groaned, slapping his hand away.

Bellamy laughed, bopping her nose. “You’ll have to take up crochet, or knitting.”

“Fuck off.” She scoffed, pushing him away, accidentally knocking him off the bed. “Shit.” He muttered in surprise as he tumbled to the floor quite suddenly.

“Oi.” He complained, his disgruntled face appearing at the edge of the bed, making Raven laugh ferociously. “I’m sorry, but you deserved it.” She apologised holding out her arms and making a puppy dog face. “Come back to me your warm.”

Bellamy stood, raising an eyebrow. “No, I don’t think I will.”

Raven pouted, folding her arms, ready to reply with equal sass when the doctor arrived at her bedside.

He released after a lengthy speech on what she could and could not do and ordered her to use a wheelchair and bed rest for at least a week, then she would have to attend physical therapy sessions. He also gave her a prescription for chronic pain.

She found all his words extremely depressing and her brief joyous mood from playing around with Bellamy was destroyed.

Their journey home was quiet. Bellamy had lifted her in and out of the car with ease, his strength and care while holding her affected her deep in her heart. To be treated with such respect and love by another human being, especially one you love and are attracted to was indescribable.

The first week back at home was hard. Raven awoke often in tears, her body overcome with pain when the drugs wore off during her sleep. She had had to wake Bellamy so often, and he’d stayed up with her during all the hard nights when the drugs just couldn’t overcome her pain, he’d barely been to work that week, and they both looked like ghosts.

The chronic pain in Ravens spine and the lack of feeling or use of her leg was driving her crazy. She had never been more frustrated with or hated herself more than during that week. She missed working, missed her lab.

But they were getting through it. As retired soldiers from the landing on Earth they each received a weekly stipend anyway, so money wasn’t tight, it was just the head of the guard wasn’t overly pleased with Bellamy. He was a captain in his own right, but still had to answer to the Generals above him.

Abbey visited often, Raven was appreciative but mostly embarrassed to have her see the state of their house. All the houses in the settlement were the same, very much like the cabins they had had in space, but earthier and less spacey.

But despite the hurdles they had survived the week, and they survived the next one as well.

The following Friday, almost two weeks since she’d been back on her feet, she was more or less back to usual. The physical therapy was genuinely helping, even though it completely exhausted her. Bellamy too was sleeping better since she was, and looked more himself as well.

That night there was an event being held at Chancellor Kane’s mansion. It was the 3rd Annual Clan Unity Gala, and they’d never really decided whether to attend. So, bored and riddled with cabin fever, they decided to go.

It was a fancy affair, requiting a full crisp tuxedo from Bellamy and a ravishing dress for Raven. Bellamy looked gorgeous, of course, but as they arrived it was Raven who stole the attention.

Her long hair was swept into an Ariana Grande style pony tail and her makeup was sensual and smoky. She was wearing tiny diamonds in her ears and around her wrists and she was a beautiful red ball gown. It featured an intricately lace embroidered bodice and a wide skirt billowed over layers of tulle, hiding her leg brace, and creating a stunning vision for everyone’s eyes to feast upon.

She held tight to Bellamy’s arm as they were greeted by friends and acquaintances and stagers alike.

She waved to Monty and Jasper across the room and smiled at Abbey over the heads of some people talking to her that she didn’t know. However, it wasn’t until they finally found Clarke that Raven began to relax. “Oh my god Raven!” Clarke squealed, wrapping her in a tight hug. “Oh, I’m so happy to see you!” Raven returned, squeezing her friend tight. “I’ve missed you, I know you were unwell, I wish I’d come to see you, I’ve honestly been so busy.” Clarke apologized, guilt written all over her face.

“It’s okay.” Raven assured her, letting her go and looking her up and down, admiring how hot she looked in her stunning blue velvet ball gown at seven months pregnant. “Bellamy!” Clarke said fondly, turning to him for a hug. “How are you doing, baby doing good?” She asked as Lexa joined them, greeting them with polite smiles as she put an arm around Clarkes waist.

Clarke’s eyes lit up as she put a hand on her belly and leaned toward Lexa affectionately. “The baby is so big! I can’t wait until it’s over,” She smirked a little, laughing at her own silliness. “But I love it.”

Raven smiled as Bellamy continued their conversation, withdrawing a little as the three of them talked. She admired the wine coloured sequined masterpiece Lexa was wearing before her eyes drifted elsewhere. She noticed French doors not far from where she was standing and slowly she strayed toward them. She exited the ballroom, leaving the gala behind in favour of the fresh air outside on the balcony.

She gazed at the starry night sky, a cold breeze ruffling her hair. She was lost in thought, thinking about nothing and everything, almost unaware that she was shivering with cold. After a while she found herself numb and sitting on the stone floor, her back against the little columns of the balcony railing. It wasn’t until she heard her own sobs that she focused, crashing back to reality and her own tears before sinking back into the numbing depression again.

She was a shivering, snivelling mess when Bellamy found her, tears and makeup running down her cheeks and throat, hair whipped around by the wind, her hands and dress dirty from the stone she was sitting on. Her shoulders wracked with sobs as he crouched beside her, his voice alarmed as he wrapped his warm arms around her.

“Raven, baby I’ve been looking for you everywhere. It’s been hours since I’ve seen you. Have you been out here the whole time?” He asked anxiously, taking off his jacket and wrapping her in it.

She just looked at him through her teary eyes, barely registering his words.

Bellamy was terrified of how dead her eyes looked in that moment. “Come on baby, let me get you home.” He tried to scoop her up but she batted him off.

“NO!” She argued, turning away from him, breaking out of his warm embrace.

“Raven! It’s freezing out here. Come inside.” He demanded, his voice gentle but firm, his distress evident.

“No.” Her voice was filled with anguish as she burst into fresh tears, her mind racing, unable to focus on reality, her conscious slipping into a deep pool of pain, rendering her incapable of thinking logically. Bellamy made noises of frustration before sitting down beside her and pulling her close to him. She fought initially but quieted as her body desperately clung to his warmth and she burrowed under his arm, seeking refuge.

Slowly, his familiar scent, soap and warm skin, and his familiar feel, muscular arms around her, hard chest beneath her, and the sound of his steady even breathing brought her back to a place of calm. Gradually she regained her senses, her eyes flooding again as she became aware of her behaviour. “Oh Bellamy.” She whispered, cringing, and hiding her face under his arm in shame. “I’m sorry.”

The pressure of his hold of her increased as he hugged her tighter. He wanted to help, he didn’t want her to feel guilty for things that were out of her control. He stood up, turning, and pulling her up after him. He held her narrow shoulders, catching her eye and holding it. “Raven, I love you. And nothing you are feeling or doing is something you must apologize for. But I need you to be safe. If,” His voice caught a little and he looked away briefly, overcome with emotion. “If I’m not someone you trust enough to be around, I will take you to someone you want to help you.”

Raven’s heart almost broke as she heard his words, Bellamy’s face clearly riddled with the pain of saying them.

“No. No.” She wrapped her arms around him, clinging to his tall frame like it was her anchor. “I need you. I don’t deserve you, you shouldn’t have to put up with this. With me. But I need you.”

She looked up at him, her expression truly anguished. “I need you.”

“And I need you.” He replied, his voice hoarse with emotion. He swallowed hard, turning away to wipe his eyes, relieved by her words and comforted that his worst fear, that she didn’t need him, was unfounded. He loved her more than words could describe and the last few minutes had been more emotionally draining then he let on. He just wanted to get home, get warm, sleep, and recover.

Raven felt the same, so they made a hasty exit, avoiding saying goodbye to anyone so she wouldn’t be embarrassed by concern over her appearance.

Once home they showered together, it wasn’t sexual, it was practical, otherwise Raven would have to bathe, as she couldn’t stand alone. The hot water warmed them, bringing colour back to her cheeks and washing away the sting of the recent events.

Still wrapped in fluffy towels but dried off they collapsed into bed, cuddling together affectionately, warming each other, and savouring the healing for their souls through their physical closeness.

Raven played with Bellamy’s hands for a while, just feeling their familiarity and beauty, running her finger tips over his knuckles and creases. She kissed his fist and then put them down. He took the opportunity to kiss her mouth softly and gently massaged her shoulder, stroking her arm until she fell asleep.

“Night Raven.” He whispered, closing his own eyes. “I love you.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

After that night Bellamy and Raven were doing better. Bellamy had a few long shifts and while he was away Raven busied herself, she wanted to stay busy so she wouldn’t have time to dwell. She scrubbed their house from floor to ceiling. She colour coded her clothes. She alphabetized her books. She baked. Well burnt. Bellamy was more the cook.

But damn did she keep busy. She even went and visited Clarke and Lexa like she’d been promising for weeks. And she and Bellamy started having sex again, which she enjoyed immensely and she could tell he was relieved when she first made advances on him.

Things were good for a while.

But Raven often felt herself slipping into the darkness. She would just get so overwhelmed, her emotions in a disarray, her sleep restless. Her nights were still littered with unpleasant dreams and Bellamy still awoke to screaming, and he still held her while she calmed down afterward.

He worried about her being alone when he worked the night shift, and constantly feared he’d come home to a lifeless body. He trusted Raven, but he knew this depression was overwhelming her and he worried she might lose the battle one day and it made his heart ache to think about it.

So, desperate for solution he brought his girlfriend home a particularly special gift one night.

He arrived to find her curled on their couch, wearing a pair of his boxers and one of his hoodies, her hair pulled into a messy top knot. She was wrapped in a blanket and listening to the radio, her expression blank.

“Hey baby.” Bellamy greeted her, setting the card box he was carrying on the floor and sinking onto the couch beside her. “Hey.” She greeted him, summoning a smile. It was a pale comparison to her usual one but Bellamy appreciated the effort.

“What’s in the box, and why does it have air holes?” She asked him interestedly, her brow furrowing in confusion.

“Oh, that box? That’s for you.” Bellamy informed her nonchalantly, leaning back to watch as she excitedly retrieved it.

“Oh my god it’s a cat!” Raven exclaimed in excitement, lifting a fat tabby cat out of the box. “Oh, he’s perfect.”

She cuddled the cat to her chin as she climbed back onto the couch. Bellamy ruffled its ears and smiled, pleased to see how friendly and immediately cuddly it was.

“I’m gonna call him Bubbles.” Raven decided, later that evening as they were eating noodles and laying on their bed with recently named cat between them.

“Good name.” Bellamy approved, forking in the last of Ravens noodles on top of his own dinner.

“I wonder, how could I reward you for such a wonderful surprise?” Raven teased, her eyes sparkling with mischief, looking more alive than she had in weeks.

“Oh, well please allow me to write you a list.” Bellamy replied with a smirk, shoving the dishes out of their bed and pulling a pillow under his head.

Raven screwed up her noise and hit him lightly with her own pillow, causing Bubbles to scamper from the room rather conveniently.

“Or, you could forget this list of yours and I could suck your dick?” She suggested hopefully, licking her lips seductively.

“If I ever don’t say yes to that, please just shoot me.” Bellamy chuckled, tossing her pillow back at her.

“It’s a deal.” She agreed, rolling over and pressing her lips to his. “Get rid of those pants sucker or your deals going out the window.” She murmured into his mouth, her own hot and wet again this.

“Yes mam.” Bellamy saluted, cupping her face momentarily to kiss her back, deep, and sweet before hastening to do away with his clothing.

Once her boyfriend had removed his trousers in preparation for her she shuffled down the bed, her dead leg making it a bit more difficult than it should be.

“Mmhhmm.” She moaned, taking Bellamy’s thick manhood in her hand, his length extending far beyond her small fist. She pumped him bout and down a few times, getting his semi hardon to swell to the fully erect and super impressive cock that it was. She pulled herself atop Bellamy, lying on his thigh, her breasts pushed up around her chin as she licked the shaft of Bellamy’s cock.

Slowly, gently, she licked and sucked at it, working him into an impatient mess before she wrapped her lips around the tip and swallowed as much as she could. It didn’t help that she had to hold the cock, leaning it in her direction so she could insert it into her wet mouth.

Bellamy groaned and panted as she sucked him, her small throat bulging with his size inside her, her hands cupping and gently stroking his balls as she sucked at him earnestly. She worked his shaft with her hands whilst her wet tongue devoured the sensitive tip and half his shaft.

“I’m gonna cum.” Bellamy panted, clutching the sides of the bed as Raven pleasured his throbbing organ. Raven appreciated his warning, pulling her mouth away and pumping his cock steadily as his body jerked suddenly and a thick spurt of semen shot into the air. Raven kept stroking and caressing his manhood as he unloaded ropes and ropes of semen into his abdomen. As he ran out, a few dribbles oozing out, Raven sucked off his fast-becoming flaccid penis, enjoy his groans of protest as he writhed under the over stimulation.

Once his hardness was entirely dealt with Raven rolled off him so he could go and clean himself, which he only did after giving her his heartfelt thanks and a pinch on the arse.

While Bellamy showered Raven brushed her teeth and went and found her new cat before lying in bed again. She unbuckled her leg brace and chucked it aside, snuggling down in her bed with bubbles on her stomach, his warm weight a comfort to her weary soul.

She truly did love the gift and she wondered if it might really help her out of this rut she was in.

She hoped it would anyhow, coz neither Bubbles or Bellamy deserved to have to deal with her shit. Her thoughts were interrupted by Bellamy’s damp arrival, which she greeted cheerfully with a passionate kiss before they settled down to sleep.

“Don’t go stealing my girl in the night now, okay Bubbles?” Bellamy scolded, petting the cat before he closed his eyes.

“He couldn’t if he tried.” Raven assured him sleepily, intertwining her hand with Bellamy’s as she drifted to sleep, nothing more comforting than him being beside her in the darkness of the night.


End file.
